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Yesterday, as I was getting into my van, a youngish man approached me.
"What are you doing today?" He asked in a familiar tone.
"Stuff." I answered.
"Are you going home?"
".....?"
"I'm looking for a place to shower." He explained.
"I'm sort of homeless myself," I said, "I can't really help you." His eyes scanned the van.
"Do you travel around?" He asked hopefully.
"Yes."
"Do you want to hang out?"
"No thank you, I'm busy today."
"Ok."
But he kept watching me like a sad puppy. And I thought for a moment that my world might expand just a little bit if I said yes and spent time with this stranger. But I actually was busy yesterday. And today. The list of things to do never ends - we all have it, the list that gets longer and longer, the more you accomplish the more there is to do.
Today I feel a little buried under the list. Not much of a list really, more of a tangle.
But on a good note: Tuesday night's show was lovely. The audience was tiny but dedicated and I love my fans. I got a big beautiful gift basket filled with flowers, chocolate and port wine, and I got a really yummy eggplant parmesan dinner. People travelled from far away to come see me. People took time out of their busy list-filled lives to listen to me. For this I am grateful.
I have a tiny little following of dedicated, intelligent, creative, lovely people who are all intense in their own ways, and love what I do. Even when I feel I am floundering, lost in an abyss of "I don't know how to do it all over again!" I can look to the gifts I have, the people who support me, the daily emails of appreciation.
It's good, my ambition is a bottomless pit. Exhausting, and exhaustive.
It's hard to be homeless, internet connection doesn't always happen where I am staying and I live out of a suitcase. I don't get to rehearse enough and I haven't had a good night's sleep in a few weeks.
But I'm pretty cute for a homeless girl. And you can purchase a t-shirt that says so.
Read a review of tuesday Night's show here: Review
Buy tickets for next week's show here: Tickets
Buy a "Kim Boekbinder - pretty cute for a homeless girl" shirt here by sending $20 to kim (at) kimboekbinder.com via paypal - specify gender and size.
Pre-order my album and make love to the universe here: www.theimpossiblegirl.com
I've posted my new song in the member's section of my pre-order website - if you are a member you can hear the new song!!!
Your awesomeness is well worth the travel. See you soon.
ReplyDeleteI kind of feel like you're trivializing homelessness with all of this. You're not really homeless, in the sense that kid was probably homeless. You were staying someplace, whether it was in a hotel, motel, or someone's house or apartment or whatever. You have money to do what you want and need to do. That kid didn't.
ReplyDeleteI'm annoyed you didn't help him out to get a shower just because you have a "list" of things to do. I'm really disappointed you couldn't take time out to help someone for real. I'm a fan of you but I won't be buying any of your "cute for a homeless girl" shirts because you're not really homeless and pretending you are isn't cute or funny.
I know what you mean; situations like that are so hard. You want to help, but where does it end. And how can you take someone in and just let them go back out into the world. I always feel great remorse for the homeless, especially as winter falls on New England.
ReplyDeleteNot having a place you can call your own or a bed or an internet connection you can rely on is hard. I've stay with friend all over, and even for a week or so, not having that kind of control over your life becomes daunting.
You are very cute for a homless girl, and please know, that as long as I have a place, you are never truly homeless, and I'm sure I'm not the only one who feels that way.
<3ry